image from cnn.com

A few weeks ago I had dinner with Suzanne Falter Barns, and we started talking about the tragedy of events related to a retreat led by James Arthur Ray.

“This is the personal development world’s 9/11″, she said, and as the aftermath pours out, she may be right.

In case you aren’t aware of what happened, Mr. Ray held a high priced event where he chose to incorporate his interpretation of Native American spiritual practices, namely the Vision Quest and the Sweat Lodge.

He did so in a way that has, so far, left 3 people dead and dozens more injured. And what he did was not actually a Vision Quest or a Sweat Lodge, but misinformed imitations.

It’s very hard not to judge a man who acted irresponsibly- but as much as I’d like to drop judgment, the news of his actions after this tragedy seem like an insult to the people who lost their lives. He carried on business as usual until 2 weeks after the tragedy.

I’m sure in retrospect he’s probably wishing his October 28 post had been published immediately after the day of the deaths, but that’s one he’s going to have to grapple with.

The Personal and The Professional: My Reasons For Speaking Out

1. Because I work with clients who aspire to the spotlight, I must show all sides of what can happen once you’re there.When I work with my clients, we focus on the The Public Self and The Payoff, but we also make sure The Private Self is in check. That means anything the public doesn’t see: how you run your business and your life behind the scenes. As a highly visible expert, you have a duty and an obligation to not abuse your power. Keeping the ego checked is essential if you’re truly guided by mission.

2. This incident calls into question how people choose to invest in themselves. It’s really none of my concern how or how much people invest in order to grow as spiritual, highly developed humans. I put a lot of time and effort into my own personal development, so I’m not here to criticize. As an offshoot of the criticisms around James Ray, there is also a surge of criticism of people who invest in their self care and growth. Life coaches, counselors, workshop leaders, and anyone in the transformational fields do wonders for others and for our planet. Knocking someone as weak or not together because he or she chooses to spend money on inner work is silly.

That's me in the foreground at an Aztec Dance ceremony for summer solstice

All that being said, in traditional Native American circles, money is NEVER exchanged for prayers or access to ceremony. Period. You can share a thank you afterwards by providing food, gas money, or gifts of appreciation but it’s not the entry way. Paying for a sweat is a surefire way to know that it’s not traditionally based. How do I know this? See my next point.

3. Thirdly, he disrespected traditional ways I follow. One of the reasons why I have waited to share on this topic is because sweats and other indigenous ceremonies are part of my tradition and I am very keen on keeping that a part of my private life. Sure, you can see photos of me in my Aztec dance regalia in my social media pics, and if you read my stuff enough you’ll hear me often refer to my inner ass-kicking alter ego The Aztec Warrior Queen. But I don’t brand around that or draw attention to it- the same way not every Christian chooses to brand around their faith but rather to let it shine through actions. This I know: James Ray was not properly trained or initiated to carry out the “ceremonies” he conducted.

Some Tips

Everyone wants to know what to make of this and many conversations are circulating that I encourage you to be part of.

In my opinion, we’re talking about ego run amuck. We’re also talking about the continued misuse of spiritual traditions by improperly trained “gurus”.

I left the following comments on The Get Known Now Blog, and I’m sharing them with you to get you questioning gurus and leaders and how you attain your spiritual growth. I also want you to think about the powerful work you do and where your POWER boundaries are.

There’s also a link to a great radio interview at the end of the post- I hope this helps all of us reach a place of clarity around these tragic, preventable deaths.

MY COMMENTS FROM THE GET KNOWN NOW BLOG COMMENT STREAM:

The questions one needs to ask before getting into the proverbial car with a guru are more important than ever before.

From my viewpoint, if someone is using ceremonies borrowed from other cultures, first you need to find out if that person is qualified or respected in the other culture to begin with. I checked around the Native American community and nobody I know has ever seen him do the long, hard path of ceremonies and commitments it takes to be a sweat lodge leader or to put people on a vision quest. That would be like someone going to a weekend course to become a Jewish Rabbi. It’s a cultural insult as well as a fraud.

So if the person doesn’t hold the credibility, that is one big red flag.

I suggest seekers look at gurus of any sort by asking questions:

1. What is this person’s background and training?
2. How authentic is this?
3. Is the person credible?
4. Does this look like a commitment this person walks in his or her life… or something that sounds alluring to fill spaces?
5. Is any part of my own power being jeopardized?

I listened to an incredible radio program with Shawna Bowen. She was on site providing support to victims while this went on. She knows her stuff, and in this interview (it’s long but hang on for the entire thing if you want a true understanding of the scope of this incident) she brings in a gentleman by the name of Jim Tree, who shares his opinion of this from the Native American perspective.

Here’s the link… I suggest everyone listen to this to fully understand all sides of the incident.

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/ShawnaBowen/2009/10/13/Support-and-Insight-for-Parents-with-troubled-Teen

My prayers go out to the families and loved ones of the dead and injured. I also send a prayer out to James Ray, hoping he experiences his own transformation and growth as a result of this event and re-examines his business model and motives. I also send a big prayer out to all of you and encourage everyone to keep finding ways to dig deeper into yourself so you can put your powerful message out into the world in a way that activates positive change and growth into the healing this world so badly needs.