Missionaries of the Sacred Heart: Finding the Value in Growing Old
Finding the Value in Growing Old
Praying old man by Julian Falat (1853-1929). PD-Art (Note this image is the the public domain)
There is a lot of interest these days in the spirituality of aging. It even sounds counter-cultural! Our spirituality helps us to focus and to discover meaning and value. I think we might mention two or three points here, among the many issues that are open to good discussion.
Aging for us should be a time of growing, not dying. An oak tree or a deer, after a life of activity and renewing the species, begins to grow old and fade back into the good earth. We too share this with them, and we too are as subject to the increasing weakness and breakdowns of mind and body. But unlike them, old age is also a time to reap the harvest of a lifetime of growth and passion. It should be a time which allows for indulging in the gifts that have been most precious. For some it might be the richness of music or literature. For others it is the freedom to spend time with loved ones or in serving others. I recall one of our priests for whom the study of Scripture had been the center of his love and passion. In his later years, abandoned by the robust physical health he had enjoyed, he spent wonderful hours studying the Scriptures for the pure joy of doing so. Blessed indeed are those who have developed rich interests and loves during their earlier years which they can now indulge. How sad to see those who lived without passion and dedicated their lives only to their work. How sad to see those who have had to work to maintain their sense of dignity because they had developed nothing beyond their work. Sad too are those who must work until they cannot because they have no other way to support themselves or receive medical care. A genuine spirituality of aging should see aging as a time of fulfillment of ones passions and loves. Those who have no passion are truly poor and tend to withdraw into loneliness. Few people respect those who are empty.
Within the context of faith, aging is about life, not ending life. We begin to let go of what has been, not to leave a void, but to fill a void with the rich hope of eternal union with God. Like the rest of nature, we are beginning to let go of what has been, and this is not without some nostalgia and sorrow. Unlike the oak and the deer, aging is the last stage of new growth. As the preface of the Mass of Christian burial reminds us, “life is changed, not taken away.” This insight of faith gives aging its true value and meaning. We grieve the sorrow of letting go of what has been and embrace the beginning of new and eternal life. And in this process, the older among us begin to integrate the real meaning of their life experience. And they do so with understanding and tolerance. This may be why so many young people love to share their own experiences with grandparents or other older persons. Young people are clever enough to discover that grandma can understand the meaning and value of what they are trying to say. Grandma may throw up her hands or laugh heartily at the thought of what her grandchild is doing, but she understands the underlying value. The values are real and endure.
Sometimes older people are very much aware of the effects of aging and deteriorating health and begin to feel some embarrassment for their bodies. The Spirituality of the Heart reminds us that the human person is both body and spirit and that our humanity is integral to our being. The body never loses its value and significance, even when it is weakened and hurting. Mary, holding the crucified Christ in her arms, loved his broken and torn body no less than the day she held him in the stable in Bethlehem. Appreciating our humanity is essential to the spirituality of our later years.
In the previous article, we reflected on respecting the older members of our human family. Since respect begins within oneself, by seeing ourselves as God sees us, the man or woman who experiences aging as a time of spiritual growth does not lose sight of his or her own dignity. Projecting this dignity, not to be in any way confused with bitter arrogance and self pity, calls others to recognize worth and value. The spirituality of aging is a fulfillment of a life of love and passion. It reaps the unchanging values of human passion and the experience of life. “I am the resurrection and the life; whoever believes in me, even if he dies, will life and everyone who lives and believes in me will never die.” John 11:25
Fr. Dave Foxen, MSC
Questions for Reflection:
Aging for us should be a time of growing, not dying. An oak tree or a deer, after a life of activity and renewing the species, begins to grow old and fade back into the good earth. We too share this with them, and we too are as subject to the increasing weakness and breakdowns of mind and body. But unlike them, old age is also a time to reap the harvest of a lifetime of growth and passion. It should be a time which allows for indulging in the gifts that have been most precious. For some it might be the richness of music or literature. For others it is the freedom to spend time with loved ones or in serving others. I recall one of our priests for whom the study of Scripture had been the center of his love and passion. In his later years, abandoned by the robust physical health he had enjoyed, he spent wonderful hours studying the Scriptures for the pure joy of doing so. Blessed indeed are those who have developed rich interests and loves during their earlier years which they can now indulge. How sad to see those who lived without passion and dedicated their lives only to their work. How sad to see those who have had to work to maintain their sense of dignity because they had developed nothing beyond their work. Sad too are those who must work until they cannot because they have no other way to support themselves or receive medical care. A genuine spirituality of aging should see aging as a time of fulfillment of ones passions and loves. Those who have no passion are truly poor and tend to withdraw into loneliness. Few people respect those who are empty.
Within the context of faith, aging is about life, not ending life. We begin to let go of what has been, not to leave a void, but to fill a void with the rich hope of eternal union with God. Like the rest of nature, we are beginning to let go of what has been, and this is not without some nostalgia and sorrow. Unlike the oak and the deer, aging is the last stage of new growth. As the preface of the Mass of Christian burial reminds us, “life is changed, not taken away.” This insight of faith gives aging its true value and meaning. We grieve the sorrow of letting go of what has been and embrace the beginning of new and eternal life. And in this process, the older among us begin to integrate the real meaning of their life experience. And they do so with understanding and tolerance. This may be why so many young people love to share their own experiences with grandparents or other older persons. Young people are clever enough to discover that grandma can understand the meaning and value of what they are trying to say. Grandma may throw up her hands or laugh heartily at the thought of what her grandchild is doing, but she understands the underlying value. The values are real and endure.
Sometimes older people are very much aware of the effects of aging and deteriorating health and begin to feel some embarrassment for their bodies. The Spirituality of the Heart reminds us that the human person is both body and spirit and that our humanity is integral to our being. The body never loses its value and significance, even when it is weakened and hurting. Mary, holding the crucified Christ in her arms, loved his broken and torn body no less than the day she held him in the stable in Bethlehem. Appreciating our humanity is essential to the spirituality of our later years.
In the previous article, we reflected on respecting the older members of our human family. Since respect begins within oneself, by seeing ourselves as God sees us, the man or woman who experiences aging as a time of spiritual growth does not lose sight of his or her own dignity. Projecting this dignity, not to be in any way confused with bitter arrogance and self pity, calls others to recognize worth and value. The spirituality of aging is a fulfillment of a life of love and passion. It reaps the unchanging values of human passion and the experience of life. “I am the resurrection and the life; whoever believes in me, even if he dies, will life and everyone who lives and believes in me will never die.” John 11:25
Fr. Dave Foxen, MSC
Questions for Reflection:
- What are your interests? What are you passionate about? How do you pursue these interests now? What are some ways you have been able to (or think you will be able to) fulfill them as you grow older?
- What is your sense of dignity tied to? How do you define yourself? How has your definition of yourself affected (or how do you think it will affect) your experience of growing older?