
CK Goldiing is genuinely shocked to learn that David Beckham having asthma is giving HOPE to parents who have previously had problems encouraging their children to use an inhaler. WHO THE HELL thinks that saying: “Look Tommy, David Beckham uses an inhaler!” is more effective than saying: “Use your inhaler Tommy… or you’ll die!” Sometimes I despair…

CK Goldiing hopes you find something you like in the below list…

CK Goldiing wants to conduct a scientific experiment. I call this: ‘The Stupid Test’. Was Mariah Carey singing live during X-Factor, Saturday 22 November? YES or NO...

CK Goldiing was advised to see a psychologist last night simply because I shared something with a friend that APPARENTLY is a very foreign approach to life. This is what I said: “… out of all the things in my life that could hurt me, a girlfriend cheating doesn’t even figure in my TOP 15!” What do you think? Do I require the services of a shrink? I’m not convinced…

CK Goldiing thinks a new relationship is like a new wristwatch. At first, you can’t wait to show off the new piece draped on your arm. Little hands ands big hands are all over each other. The passing of time is new and exciting. However, as the months and the years elapse, the little hand begins to slow… to the point of no strokes... at all. At this point, a swift slap to the face usually helps…

Joe how did the gig go buddy?

CK Goldiing wonders if you’d like to share your TOP 3 films with everyone. Here are mine…

CK Goldiing is watching the FIRST EVER episode of ‘Moonlighting’ on Sky channel #149/ Jesus H. Christ… Cybil Shepherd was a sight to behold in her heyday!!!

CK Goldiing likes Lady GaGa’s music but doesn’t want to like Lady GaGa’s music. The trouble is… I don’t know why I don’t want to like Lady GaGa’s music. What’s wrong with liking Lady GaGa’s music? Does anyone know why I don’t want to like Lady GaGa’s music even though I like Lady GaGa’s music…?

CK Goldiing has received a few text messages from those of you who are joining me for my FIRST EVER STUDENT GIG @ Sheffield Hallam University Union later tonight. Thank you!! I’ll be updating the rest of you via my mobile throughout the night… letting you know how it’s going… :-)

Maximo Newtonio
RE: Bruce Willis. Check this out:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ni90iL81w TQ

CK Goldiing is happy with the ‘ice-breaker’ comment he’ll use for his FIRST university gig tomorrow evening. See below for a taster of what you’ll hear from me if you come to Sheffield Hallam University Union tomorrow from 8pm – where I shall be the opening act…

CK Goldiing is fu*king annoyed that he can’t use today’s status update for a funny observation, amusing anecdote or to advertise Sunday’s gig @ Sheffield Hallam University simply because some batty old woman thinks she is more bloody important! Well, happy 60th birthday mum… I hope you’re pissing proud of yourself!!! xx
















