Gdub

Gdub I've truly reached a new state of pretentiousness as I now regularly use words which, though real, are not in spell-check's dictionary.

Danya Lynd
Danya Lynd
You inspire me.
Yesterday at 4:40pm
Gdub

Gdub Some really vain chick accused me of oogling her. Ladies always accuse me of that, but it's wishful thinking. I'm way too hot for them.

Gdub

Gdub Let's be honest, this cheese spread is less like "whiz" and more "diarrhea". Marketing shmarketing.

Gdub

Gdub Don't look at me dude! That case of fifty White Castle sliders was empty when I got here. Also, you're probably out of mustard.

Gdub

Gdub I think it's cute that they let baboons work at this Home Depot. Wait, that's a person? Oh dear heavens!

Gdub

Gdub Remember the whole "Obama Dance Battling Tony Blair" trending topic? Wait, what year am I in? Crap, I've said to much.

Gdub

Gdub The greatest lie the devil ever told was that his name was spelled S-A-T-I-N.

Gdub

Gdub You guys, I think Adam Lambert maybe is gay.

Gdub

Gdub Eating a day old Gyro & watching an awards show. Hello Rock Bottom. Nice to meet you.

Gdub

Gdub I'm thinking about starting an Urban Legend claiming you can cure an eye infection with Red Rooster Hot Sauce. What do you think?

Gdub

Gdub I just got back from the dentist. Downside is I can't feel my face, but the upside is my Quasimodo impression is even better now!

Gdub

Gdub Attention female coworkers: the fact that you use more TP when you go #1 then I do when I make #2 is scary. Consult a physician.

Gdub

Gdub Vampire? More like vamp-lease-kill-me-now.

Gdub

Gdub "Does this (insert completely random non-related object) make me look fat?" Make it easy on your man and ask it that way.

Gdub

Gdub People who make hyperbolic comments are even worse than those pedophiles that choose chunky over smooth cranberry sauce.

Gdub

Gdub Baconogg is something I could get behind.

Gdub

Gdub There comes a point when you just have to man up and say, "no more! Stop moving my figurines mom!"

Gdub

Gdub Fun Fact: Stephanie Meyer actually had the image of Perry Farrell in her head as she wrote the character Edward Cullen.

Gdub

Gdub Even the manliest of men cannot resist singing along to the dulcet tones of Selina. IIIIIII COULD FAAAALL IN LOOOOO-OOOVE WITH YOUUUUU-OOOO!

Gdub

Gdub If I had a fortune cookie company I'd make all the fortunes say "You're having a heart attack". For one person it will be a life saver.

Gdub

Gdub Is there a form of punctuation to denote Air Quotes?

Joseph Anthony Tony Rosales
Joseph Anthony Tony Rosales
no, you just preface it with, "and (s)he was all.." and then say the quote in a mocking tone of voice.
November 19 at 12:01pm
Gdub

Gdub The next book in the Twilight series will be titled: Waking Up From A Crazy Dream Regretting Taking Melatonin & Meth Before Bed Last Night

Gdub

Gdub I used to see this really narcissistic shrink. He'd always ask, "how does that make you feel...about me?"

Gdub

Gdub A childhood friend of mine recently came out of the closet. Now I understand his hangup about not having enough Kens when we played Barbies.

Gdub

Gdub I'm going to start a paid service. You want to get somebody off facebook? Give me $5 and I'll start a chat. They'll go offline lickity split

Gdub

Gdub Studios are taking another chance on the GI-Joe franchise. This version by Tyler Perry is called GI-JO-NO-YOU-DIDN'T!

Gdub

Gdub Aaaaaaaaaand I'm done. Or, as the kid's say, "I'm donner".

Gdub

Gdub You guys go ahead and impose your "Western Ideals" on the Donner Party, but I'll tell you what, Femurs make a great soup stock!

Gdub

Gdub "Don't eat the goose that lays the golden egg" takes on a whole new meaning when you're in the Donner Party.

Gdub

Gdub Hey Shawty, it's yer' birfday, we're gunn'a Donner Party like it's yer' birfday, we're gunna' eat flesh just like it's yer' birfday!

Gdub

Gdub I once broke up with a girlfriend like this: you know what, let's just *Donner* this thing and call it quits!