Jake Yapp

So this weekend I popped my Festival Cherry (apart from Edinburgh) and went to the Offset Festival, surely the best alternative rock festival, in Hainault, in early September, in the world.I was there to perform in the comedy tent. This is the comedy tent:It wasn't as glamorous as it looks, though...

08.12 Mile 0 The boot is full. Our souls are empty. Still we pack. Will there be room for the three of us? 09.31 Mile 0 We are OFF, out of this shitten town, on a brisk, clear February morning. 09.42 Mile 3 I can feel we are approaching city limits...

20.33Mile 414Home. Fuck Ye Off, Mate.

Well, it's over. Over, over, over.My free show has finally garnered some reviews, getting a whopping 2 and 1 stars. And I have learned a lot. I absolutely, unquestionably, overstretched myself this summer. Two shows is a ridiculous amount of material. Along with the breakfast show...

Corblimey, eh? 22? Blige. Today was busy, busy, busy. Managed a 7-8 mile run this morning, which, since it was through some pretty dodgy areas, I reckon counts for double mileage when you factor in the adrenalin. Did a guest spot at a venue called The Grape, with Katerina Vrana. Bloody hell...

Blimey. Interesting sort of day. Blimmin lovely in the afternoon. Tried a new piece of erotic literature. It was deeply sexy. I can't remember what it was now...

About that review. Not, I hope, that you have read it. It was in threeweeks, it was three stars, and it was pretty non-committal. Anyway. SHOULD you decide to read it, do take it in the context of its author...

We cancelled this evening's show. With no pre-booked tickets, and Team Yapp/Lescott pretty knackered, we decided to cut our losses and save ourselves for the Last Big Push.Fantastically lovely afternoon show though! Such nice people, including some who had been to the pay show...

EEEEEEEEEEEOOOOWWWWWWWBCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHThat is the sound of the Edinburgh bubble bursting for many people this evening. Where is everybody? Shows cancelled, tiny audiences... Lordy. I had a small but select bunch in this evening. I think they enjoyed it. Sometimes you just can't tell...

Arrrrt mate wicked is it.Tonight was smashing. 59 people in. Including, I am humbled to say, Danny Wallace and his enchanting wife Greta. And now I am drunk and must get up in shit fuck shit fuck 5hrs14mins.Anyway. It was great...

Another super time. Chiefly, I think, thanks to valiant flyering by my poor exhausted parents. Afterwards, went and did my little guest spot on the Pink Bus. I was followed by Simon Munnery, who has always been a bit of a hero of mine (remember Alan Parker, Urban Warrior?)...

Swings and roundabouts, mate. Swings and roundabouts.It was a belter of a show. Such a lovely crowd. It does reinforce this dumb idea of perceived value. The audience this evening comprised almost exclusively people who had paid for their ticket. Which means they've invested in the show...

This is a mad way to live.For the last half an hour, all I have done is debate with myself whether to have a shower now, or after the afternoon show. Or to go for a run after the afternoon show and then shower. Or to run now, shower, and then do the afternoon show...