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- Affiliation:
- Crescent Beach Books, Horton Press, Hard Candy, CanadaWry
- Location:
- Toronto, ON
- Birthday:
- January 12
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- Reminds Me of a Certain South Park Episode… 4:35pm Jan 1
- BULL-PUCKY 5:09pm Dec 23
- Homeless Man Named Mustard Sings Radiohead 4:53pm Dec 12
Did anybody else notice that she said “size 10″…today in the size 0 = world, that would be considered fat. Not relevant, just an observation.
I’m not done with this yet. It should be considered “work in progress…” “We wanted Tiger to be the best. We needed him to be the best. We needed someone we could all look up to, someone who represented all that we could possibly achieve. And as it turns out, he wasn’t the best. He wasn’t [...]
I don’t care what you say…I like him. With a name like “Mustard…” Lots of music sounds bad to me now…ie: theme from friends sounds like gorillas singing…and something earlier sounded like monsters belching…but Mustard is fine. I wonder how he would sound if I could hear right…lol
Words are powerful tools… Words can, quite literally, change the world. Well chosen words can inspire the masses, Topple empires ….. and make women swoon. Tha...
I lost this whole post. 800 very funny words… self-deprecating… irrational and frankly, hilarious! Thi...
There’s an age old saying (and by “age old” I mean “the 1980’s”) that has graced both cheesy motivational posters and love songs written by Sting. It goes a little something like this: “If you love something, set it free. If it comes ...
An instant classic. My appreciation to CNN’s Jack Gray for the Tweet! You know, the first Twitter message I sent out was that I wished I could hire Morgan Freeman to follow me around and narrate my life…Now I realize that Christopher Walkin would probably be PERFECT for the job…could you imagine?
On Sex & Bicycles Have you ever gone so long without sex that you started wondering if anything has changed...
This is a re-write on the column from Feb 1st… I am a woman on the edge. I smoke a pack a day between 9:00pm and 9:17pm. I think Animal Crackers are a main course and I run with scissors every chance I get. ...
A Few Words on Dogs and Husbands a Comedy in Three Acts ACT ONE 10 Things Your Dog Would Never Do… Ask you to wear a collar and call him “master” Tell ...
How do advertisers know that their campaigns are working? What highly technical, super-secret metrics do they use track your spending and lifestyle habits??? Is it that Points Card you use that tells them you suffer from flaky scalp and athletes foot...
Join my network on Twitter and I’ll send you a FREE copy of DUMBASS! Join here: http://www.twitter.com/julescarlysle Email here: admin@canadawry.comsubject line Twitter and we’ll respond with the PDF! I promise to always be pithy.
Oh Johnny Honey….Johnny Depp…..you beautiful bastard. Please forgive me for what I am about to say. You KNOW how much I love you…. But Matt Damon may actually be the greatest actor of my generation….of OUR generation. No…..s...
Yes…it’s Thanksgiving…. that special day when families gather around the table to thank god for the other 364 days of the year when they can pretend they were orphaned years ago. I love turkey. I al...
I don’t have to be able to hear it, to know it’s awesome! This wedding video became an instant YouTube sensation….for obvious and wonderful reasons! For the record, I would instantly marry any man who would do that! Now ...
