I feel that the greatest gift you can give your children is your time and energy, as well as love and material things. So many women choose to work fulltime these days leaving their kids with childminders,in nurseryetc. I know that during current times money is tight for many families yet this has been going on for years. I chose to work parttime because we needed extra money but i wanted to be around to watch my children grow. If i couldve id have stayed at home fulltime. The time had with my children in their first 5 years b4 they started school was so precious and satisfying. And now i take them and collect them from school, do their homework with them . Things i couldnt do if i was working 9-5 evryday. My children also benefited by having me there with them.The problem with alot of parents today is that they want it all. " cars holidays abroad, latest gadgets. The sad thing is that when their children grow up, they wont remember having 2 cars to drive round in, or the latsest gadget round the house, but the fact that their parents were not around as much as they wouldve liked. I ask myself the question daily Why have children, only to shove em to other people to take care of whilst they carry on with their lives. Having children means making sacrifices, putting their needs before your own and if that means less overseas hols, only 1 family car etc, then so be it. If not then dont have any.What are your thoughts on this?

I agree completely. I have two children and i worked when my son was little because i had to,i was a single parent. but i missed so much and when i was home i was so tired and spent my time trying to catch up on other things. Now I am at home i am so much happier. I would rather spend time with my children coloring or painting than have two cars. there are a lot of things i wish we could afford but im glad im here to see those first steps and new witty things my 4year old has to say.

You ladies are 100% correct, before my husband & I got married we decided that it was SO important to us that I stay home with our kids. We have 2 teenagers. It's remarkable how well adjusted our kids are and we give the credit to God and that they had me full time @ home. Stay home mom's rock!

I am a stay at home mother of 4 children. I completely believe that it's a womans choice as to whether she works or stays at home. I would'nt tell a working mother that she should stay at home, and I would'nt want a working mother to tell me that I too should be working. My husband and I have made a lot of sacrifices so that I can be at home for my children. There are the many luxuries of life that we do without, but for me, it's worth it. What aggravates me are some of the reactions we stay at home moms get from SOME people when they hear that we don't work outside of the home. Almost as though we have a lack of intelligence or no ambitions. Has anyone else encountered this?

I am currently on 5 years leave from my full-time government job. I was respected and well paid and people valued my opinions. I was considered "intelligent". My husband and I believed that if I could stay home I should because our children are worth more than money. Thank God circumstances have been that we can afford for me to do so but sadly that means my husband is working extra hard overseas for months on end to earn that extra cash. I love my kids desparately but still feel "undervalued" by society because I am not in paid employment. Even the people I used to work with seem to no longer consider me "intelligent" any more because I am "just a mum" now. When my youngest is 5 years old I can go back to work if I want. But do I want? That is the question I have yet to answer.

That is exactly my point. Before I chose to stay at home I had a high pressured job at our local hospital. I wish I had a quarter for everytime someone said that I was "just a mom"

I also gave up a rewarding well paying career to say home with my children. I don't regret my decision for one minute. My children are well adjusted and happy! I also don't begrudge woman who choose to work, it is a choice and in many cases a necessity. I feel very fortunate to be able to stay home; however, I also get the reaction that I'm less because of it. I have had the what do you do all day reaction, the guess I'm not very bright reaction and why can't I help with everything at school, sporting events etc. because I don't work. I have been on sporting event boards and on the PTA board for nine years. I found that I was spending more time helping everyone else and not spending as much time with my family as I wanted. This year I chose not to be on any boards, limit my volunteering time and concentrate on my family, the reason I chose to stay home. People actually take offense now when when I say NO or can't understand why a stay at home mom can't help. Guess you can't win no matter what you do.

i believe inbeing there always for my children and dont regret it one bit my mum was always home for us and i didnt understand until i went to a friends house after school and she had to fix her own dinner and sit in an empty house till 7 8 pm and app thats better for your kids ??? i love being a mum and wouldnt change it for the world ! and also wish i had a penny for every pitiful ohh your just a mum look i get from working mums i have been there for every step my children have taken and dont regret my choice on bit but do think the government should make it eaiser for mums to be at home for the hardest unpaid (alot of overtime and weekend jobs there is )

I know from first hand what its like growing up without parents being there as I grew up.Well for one my mom work ed two and three jobs to take care of my sister and I,I know she thought she was doing the best that she could to take care of us,which she was a hard worker(don't get it twisted I lovvveeee my momma)but lilttle did she know I missed her dearly.I never got to do the activities mothers do with their daughters.My dad just gave up on us,so therefore I was bascially raised by the streets.So if ur reading this please make careful choices about whats best for your kids

I've been a full time homemaker since having my first child (out of 12!) almost 32 years ago. It's been a most wonderful and satisfying career choice! We're down to our last 3 kids at home, and I'm still a full time at-home mom. I got a college degree after my youngest was in school just for fun, but don't feel compelled to go out and "get a job." I still have a job I love and a family who appreciates me being home and available.

I couldn't agree more - and if any more proof were needed I have 18 and 16 year old boys who are, and I know they are mine so I would say this, respectful, lovely, well rounded, well grounded, helpful, kind, thoughtful, great kids. They did well at school, never got in trouble, never bunked, had/have purpose. They are not, as no one is, perfect but I wouldn't swap them for all the money in the world, nor the times I have spent with them. Because we have a close, respectful relationship - I hope there are many more times to come. Going by what they say - I'm sure there will be. This has all been built over time spent sharing things and experiences - and talking. That is the thing that must never be lost - comunication. That and them being given boundaries they understand the reasons for and mutual trust - knowing when I say yes I mean it, when I say no - same. They have repaid me with love, respect and their trust. Sounds a bit Walton-y, but it worked for us. They are now off to Uni and College to make something of their lives and I shall continue to support everything they do because I love them more than anything in the world.
p.s. I still work part time - in a school - so that I can be there if needed over the long holidays. Money is tight but we just have to think harder and plan more.

I am a mother of seven, all now grown and married, I have weathered the test of time, and am glad I was a stay at home mom. they needed me and I was there. I volunteerd in there schools and joined in there activities, helped with homework. and it worked. they are all a positive force in there lives and the lives of others. We now, my husband and I, have nineteen grandchildren, happy and healthy. and their moms and dads volunteer in there childrens schools and other acitvities. I enjoyed it, I learned a lot from it. and now I am going to school to become a medical transcriptionist. so I can run my own business and work. I will enjoy it now. Being a mom is the most rewarding work I have ever done. I worked from the time I was nine until I was twenty. Then worked raising my children till they were grown and gone. That was the easiest job I ever had. It was cool! Every day to wake up with those you love and spend time with them. from potty training to marriage and after. cool! still learning. I have learned that they repeat the terrible twos at sixteen, so if you get a grasp at two, you will survive sixteen. They learn right from wrong by the time they are eight. so they work on helping them to choose. The key is to realize when to give more rope, and when to pull the rope tight. Remember your not right because your and adult Your right because its right. and if your wrong, appologize. Prayer is a big help. If your not sure, just ask the Lord. the answers comes almost immediatly. I remember my oldest child sitting in the tub, at the age of three, with her little brother. When I started to wash him she asked me if "that", was his penis! I remember wondering where in the world did you hear "that" word? I remember clearing my throat and coughing. I said a quick prayer. I know what my mom would have done and I did not agree with it. the answer came and I said " yes, that is a penis." "Where did you hear that word?" to which she replied "oh Shauna says her brother has one" And I replied" yes boys have a penis and girls don't they are different" That was it end of conversation. and she went on her way happy as a clam. I remember what my mom whould have said. she would have slapped me called me a foul mouth little brat. grabbed me out of the tub beat my backside and thrown me into my room, and probably reminded me ever so often afterwards what a wicked child I was. And all the while I would have been wondering what I did. I am so glad to be a mom. I find nothing more rewarding. even now. And I have a lot of advice to give and stories to tell.
enjoy your day!

I've stayed at home with my chidlren for most of their life. It has been rewarding and its had its bad days too! Lets be honest we are not perfect parents. Everyday doesn't go perfectly. I homeschooled my children as well, this was an experience that took alot of myself. I had to give up tea with my girlfriends alot of times, having time to myself but this created a bond between my children and I that I can't describe, its lovely. To know the input I have had on my children is a great feeling. Our world says worth comes from abandoning what you love. Think about yourself your career. Thers so many hurting children out there because of this attitude. If all I've accomplished in life is raising my precious children well that's enough for me.

I couldnt agree with u more.Im a stay at home mom of my beautiful 9mnth old daughter,i really want to be at home with her like my mom was for me but im feeling so much pressure from my patner and his family to go back to work,its driving me nuts and making me feel really down in my eyes my daughter comes first and if someone doesnt like it they can keep it to them selfs or quite frankly be out of our lives.what do u think???

hi cheryl i think if you want to stay at home wiv ur baby then you shud an not be presured into goin back to work time is precious wen there babys cos that grow up so quick im a stay at home mum to 4 kids aged 11,9,3 an1 an i love it i wanted to go back to work before my yougest was born an then we found owt he had cerebal palsy i love bein at home wiv my kids an wudnt change it for the world

Kudos to all the stay at home mums! Being a single parent for the first 7 years of my son's life, I felt it was important to be with him but like so many others felt the pressure to go to work (mainly because I hated to be on benefits and wanted to bring my son up to be able to take advantage of all the opportunities available to him), I satyed home till he went to full time school then went back to work. I wish I never had! Despite being the only one on my department with a young child, I was given the majority of the evening shifts. I saw my son in the morning before school but by the time he got home, I was at work and by the time I finished work, it was his bedtime. I had a fantastic childminder, who did everything from homework to making crafts but it wasn't the same as doing those things with him myself. When I left work on maternity leave for my daughter, I was pretty sure I wouldn't go back. I didn't think it was fair to not give my daughter those first 5 years with me as well. My partner understood how I feel and luckily agreed. Since then we have had another daughter and there's no way I will go back to work ever. My partner works full time and like many others there are things that we have to go without so I can stay home but who cares about material things. I will not miss any more time with my son and I will never miss time with my girls.

In this day and age where so many people have kids and don't bother with them, I say good for those who stay home and raise their kids right. As for anyone who makes out your not contributing to society, I work harder as a mum than I have in any paid employment and my contribution is well mannered, family orientated, trustworthy and reliable young adults with morals for the future!

I definitely give Kudos to moms who are able to stay @ home with their children and still be able to provide for their family. Unfortunately I am not a stay at home mom but a single working mom of a 3year old little boy!! I do work very hard everyday and i believe that I have seen all the funny things he has done as he has grown. Witnessed his first walk,words, and etc....I just love the atmosphere of him being with other children in head start & learning about different cultures,beliefs,and races. Also he has been taught the fundamentals of things like sharing, playing with other children and being able to cope with things in general without mommy around all the time!!! I LOVE ALL OF THAT!!! KUDOS 2 YOU STAY @ HOME MOMS !!!!!!

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I totally agree with you and have encountered the same reactions from people. I too am a stay at home with 4 young children under under 7. My eldest is in grade 1 and the second is in prep so I get a lot of things done around the house with just the 2 young ones at home during the day. Its hard work with all the washing and cleaning and gardening etc but I am house proud and have to do it. My husband works longs hours and has recently changed careers with a big pay cut but he is gaining experience which in the long run will benefit us more than his old job. Times are tough but why would I go to work and have my children smiling at another caregiver? Call me selfish, but I want all the smiles and the kisses, I want to see the flour on their noses when we all make cookies together, I want to see the fighting over whos turn it is to lick the spoon! I take the kids to school and pick themup every day and it is impossible to look like bright eyed and cheery when yo still have reflux from the newborn down your back. I've seen people look at me with pity because I have zero time to myself and am looking and feeling run down but I keep telling myself, it's just a phase, they get older and hopefully if I've done a good enough job, they will help me too. I am satisfied knowing that I have been there for them every step of the way and if they ever need anything, I will be there. I rest my head at night knowing that that what I am doing is important, regardless of what employed mothers are thinking.

I could'nt agree more! You are doing what's best for your children, and it sounds like you're a great mother! :)

I am a newly stay at home mom and I love it more and more every day. I quit my job in January after they cut my hours and it was not making me anything to work by the time we paid for gas and lunches. So I gave notice and am now staying home. It is so great for my kids and me and I feel like I am not missing out on all those moments I had been. Now I can go to class parties at school and not have to worry about having the time off or now I get to see them get on the bus and off and help with homework and be first to hear about their school day. It is truly a blessing to be able to stay home. I have three little boys and they are a thrill a minute they are 7 (second grade) 5 (kindergarten ) and then an almost three year old so this school year should be great for getting stuff during the day with only one at home. My husband works law enforcement and the days he works he puts at least 12 hours a day sometimes more so I am glad to know that I can be here with my kids and one day they will look back and remember that mom was home with them . It is so great to be able to say when someone asks what do I do for a living? I am a stay at home mommy!