Cover Photo, No automatic alt text available.


Jesse Berlin's Profile Photo
  • Full Time Badass
    I rival Chuck Norris.
Current City and Hometown
About Jesse
  • My name is Jesse "Son of John" Berlin and I am currently 21 years old. I am a fan of driving fast, listening to awesome music, and soft toilet paper. A perfect morning for me.... is waking up in Mexico next to a beautiful caramel skin toned seniorita with the sun shining through the window putting off a certain glimmer to her face and a twinkle in her eye. Her hair smells of brown sugar and it flows through my hands like the softest silk fathomable and at that very moment, a Muchacho fired up like the spiciest jalapeno walks in through the door. As the enraged boyfriend chases me out the window wearing only my socks, the only thing I manage to grab is my sunglasses. I put them on and start running through the streets and the women start cheering me on, some are passing out, and the rest are throwing roses at my feet. Meanwhile the men are pulling out their AK-47's and start spraying bullets in my direction. At this point, I'd start to panic but I see my four best friends, Ryan Reynolds, Hugh Jackman, Kate Beckinsale, and Jessica Alba heading in my direction driving my 69' Camaro to rescue me. They pick me up and we head to Hollywood for me to present my next opening scene to Christopher Nolan for his next movie....and yes I'm still wearing only socks and sunglasses.

    But, seeing as to how some might say this is just a tad ridiculous, I did the next best thing. I created a band with my 3 real life best friends. We enjoy writing rock music and putting on the best stage show we possibly can put on. Our name is Fivefold and you can check us out at Check it out! ;)
Favorite Quotes
  • "Whats live as a monster, or die a good man?"

    "It's important not to be bitter."

    "I don't trust you Phyllis!" -Andy Bernard from The Office

    "I can Derrilick my own balls" -Zoolander

    "Dolly Parton has my VIRGINITY!!!" -Ryan Cheney

    "Whenever im about to do something i think, would an idiot do that? And if they would, I do not do that thing." -Dwight from The Office