Photos
Posts

No matter what you might read in lame books, revenge is definitely a dish served flaming hot: nothing says "don't mess with me" like a burning bag of poop left on your doorstep.

That's not the only way to get even though - here are a few ideas from a connoisseur. More at www.artofbeatingupbadguys.com - Mads

No automatic alt text available.

There’s been a lot of speculation about Robert Pattinson, his swollen hand, and his black eye. The rumors are true. Pattinson’s been brawlin’.

Here’s a shot Burvbille paparazzi caught of Pattinson and the Bad Guys crew on the way home from an after school throw-down with the high school football team.

Learn how to throw punches like Pattinson at www.artofbeatingupbadguys.com

Image may contain: 1 person
Posts

See that guy on the left? He's like bully crack cocaine - they just can't get enough of him. If you have a noble heart you might want to help him, but here's something to consider before you do: how many wedgies is a clean conscience worth?

If you help the weak, you'll have good karma but a bloody nose. As for me: I ride alone, compadre!

www.artofbeatingupbadguys.com

No automatic alt text available.

Anatomy of a perfect wedgie

There's no way anyone's walking away from this one without at least a few skidmarks. To stop this happening to you, you'll need eyes in the back of your head, reaction times worthy of Bruce Lee, and detachable underwear (we're working on that last one).

You can learn the first two at www.artofbeatingupbadguys.com - your butt will thank you.

No automatic alt text available.

If your buddy's in big trouble, you'd better BRING THE THUNDER. Think Chuck Norris + Bruce Lee x Yoda in a bad mood, and you're nearly there.

How do you bring the thunder? This should help: www.artofbeatingupbadguys.com

No automatic alt text available.

My three golden rules for the playground if you want to avoid an ass-kicking.

Rule 4 would be "keep nunchucks on you at all times (and don't be afraid to use them if someone tries to jump in line)" - Mads

More at www.artofbeatingupbadguys.com

No automatic alt text available.

Just like nobody badmouths Chuck Norris unless they want a roundhouse kick to the chops, no-one messes with a wolf unless they want to get shredded. Practice your wolf-like stare and literally no-one will dare cross you.

More info at www.artofbeatingupbadguys.com - give it a try tomorrow and let us know how many bad guys crap their pants.

No automatic alt text available.

When it comes to a class 5 wedgie, rules go out the window. You can kiss your nuts goodbye, and good luck explaining the skidmarks to your mom.

AVOID AT ALL COSTS (we're on the verge of a breakthrough on wedgie-proof undies, so keep an eye on www.artofbeatingupbadguys.com for updates)

No automatic alt text available.

You don't always need eyes in the back of your head to stop D-bags getting one up on you: anything will do in a pinch.

Don't want to take our advice? Fine, but I see an ass-whipping in your future.

For more advice your principal doesn't want you to hear, head to www.artofbeatingupbadguys.com - Mads

No automatic alt text available.

This is textbook D-bag behaviour - branding a victim with a hot eraser. To survive, look formidable (think silverback gorilla) and predators will think twice before attacking.

That's step one - to continue your education and learn how to defend yourself from a superheated eraser attack, head to www.artofbeatingupbadguys.com - your nuts will thank you.

No automatic alt text available.

This is where the magic happens

What kind of magic? The kind that makes bullies crap their pants.

We can't tell you what goes on behind that door on here - better head to www.artofbeatingupbadguys.com to find out...

No automatic alt text available.

Wax on, wax off...

If you really think that'll save you when you're getting chased down the hall by a 300lb lunk then good luck to you - if not, head to www.artofbeatingupbadguys.com for some real advice!

Image may contain: 1 person

Want to make a kick-ass HQ this weekend? Here's a starter guide. The Swayze movies are mandatory, and don't skimp on the smoke bombs - those could save your life in a pinch.

Preparation is the key to raining hell on D-Bags...

No automatic alt text available.

FIGHT: Foot vs. Nuts on eBaum's World

BBC's David Attenborough documents how a middle school girl can take out a bully with one swift (and well placed) kick. You too can learn these arts at: http://artofbeatingupbadguys.com.
ebaumsworld.com

FIGHT: foot vs nuts

Long-lost BBC footage documents how a middle school girl can take out a bully with one swift (and well placed) kick.

BBC's David Attenborough documents how a middle school girl can take out a bully with one swift (and well placed) kick.
youtube.com

Heroes don't take no popcorn and they don't take no help. To avoid wedgies in middle school, stay away from people like this (sorry Pat).

No automatic alt text available.

I'm getting ready for another week in the Middle School Jungle. This training might look hardcore to you, but if there's one thing I've learned you gotta nut-up or be prepared to get pissed on.

Train hard, amigos.

No automatic alt text available.