In fact, if it wasn't for that stupid Catholic cu*t, I might have been saved much sooner. It's hard to think for yourself when you're in a cu*t. It's like all sense goes out the window, and all you can think about is satisfying
But thanks to Lonnie's Teachings at BLUFF University
Praise all over you, Brother!
"Dear God, why do you allow so much violence in schools?" - concerned student.
"Dear concerned student, because you won't stop MASTURBATING!" - God.
Is faith b...ased arms training right for your child? We think so! Please contact: https://www.facebook.com/LonnieSMN/ for details.
God Bless some of you.
The world is slowly waking up to the dangers of masturbation, which we have been preaching for the past 2,018 years.
It is more harmful and deadlier to ring the Devils doorbell, than the Tide Pod challenge. #FaithFact
The warning comes as the body of a man was reportedly found in Hamburg covered in sliced cheese with pantyhose pulled up over his upper body, while he was wearing a diving suit and a raincoat.
Here at the BLUFF compound and SMN Ministries, we are blessed to have our own medical professionals, Dr. Cornelius Felcher and Holy Sexologist - Nikita Shalavin. If you are a non-normal who is prone to self-rape outbursts in public, reach out for help, or burn in the pits of triple-hell for eternity.
Lonnie bless some of you!
From all of us at B.L.U.F.F and SMN Ministries, to some of you, we wish you a very Merry Lonniemas!
As this is the perfect time of year for reflection and supporting noble charities, we urge you to support ours above all others.
Multiple praises will be bestowed upon you if you help those that are less normal than you. Praise!
It is precisely because of his disgusting habit, that he died a virgin. No lesser-gendered in her own right mind would entertain a self-raper. Enjoy triple-hells!
The very definition of the word "homosexual" tells us all we need to know. If you, as a grown man, can touch male genitalia and become aroused - you're gay. We at SMN do not judge homosexuals. God already has. We are simply informing sinners of what the scripture already tells us. Praise.