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Professional Skills
Current City and Hometown
About John
  • I'm very weird. I'm an oxy-moron (well, without the 'oxy' part). I'm the toughest guy on the block one minute - you turn your back, I'm in a backless leopard chiffon gown with a three foot train. I never do drag - just a transvestite. What's the difference?' you ask. Tits.
    I love who I am. I'm constantly amusing myself. There was something on the news yesterday about a shooting in a cemetary and I thought, 'Well, that's a bit redundant.'
    A buddy was using my 'puter one night. He asked, 'How do you 'refresh'?' I said, 'Strawberry douche.' As he was shaking his head, I added, 'Ya know what they OUGHTA DO? Watermelon douche! It'd take OFF in certain areas! Like Menthol cigarettes!' I could go on and on...
Favorite Quotes
  • 'You know what you look like to me with your good bag and your cheap shoes? You look like a rube. A well-scrubbed, hustling rube. Good nutrition has given you some length of bone but you're no more than one generation from poor white trash.'
    'I'd rather have a bottle in front a me than a frontal lobotomy.'
    'It is only with the heart that one can see rightly. What is essential is invisible to the eye.'
    'Some of us are very much like some of you. Most of us thank God that we're not like most of you.' (me - when I was homeless in a letter to the Times)


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