Tomorrow I marry this guy.
I've eaten a whole jar of Cadbury Almonds for the nerves.
Of course the wedding almost didn't happen, for the first time we fought all week. A combination of stress and me pushing him to be more of a talker when he just wants a moment to think and him possibly having a realisation that he's about to marry a pregnant chick with four small kids who blogs and writes books about every detail of her relationship to the world.
… I'm not your typical trophy wife.
And I'm not for everyone, but hey neither is he.
Blending families is really tough. You favour your kids, they favour theirs, you favour theirs and they favour theirs, so you resent that and you go back to favouring yours all while looking for the perfect equal, just wanting things to work.
If either of you say anything that could be perceived as negative about the others kids you turn into a fierce protective bitch, you can't help it, its instinctual.
But you keep going, growing, letting your tolerance take over, teaching your kids the lessons they need to learn to be part of a blended family.
Learning what is needed of you as a step parent and for us it was to take the whole parent part out of the roles.
Neither of our kids were looking for new mums or dads, just friendship and another adult that wants to do stuff with them, can be there for them and to have fun with. That's all they need.
And most importantly remembering that we are the team.
Me and Denzy, we are the ones who brought this chaotic glorious mess together, we are the glue, our time together and happiness is so imperative to it all making sense.
Relationships with kids involved are bloody hard work, but the rewards are even more intense then meeting and marrying the person of your dreams.
We are not for everyone, but definitely for each other 💗💗💗
And of course there will be plenty of filming and photos so we can share our love with you guys who have supported us so much this year xxx
Con